2004

by Joe B.

Good Son’s Reward

My brother and I are good son’s in that when our mother calls say she’s has to move,found a place but only has weeks to do it we rushed to help Solomon and Requel, Sister-in-law,and myself from San Francisco.

It’s a grueling 3 and a half days but mother treats us to Long John Silver for fish & chips with tartar sauce.

Finishing in record time both brother’s go their separate ways vowing never again to do the manual labor but hire people and pay them well for the privilege of helping dear mom.

I had already written a column about the 1947 film classic "It’s A Wonderful Life" But Stuupidly erased it somehow.

Its about small town life in Bedford Falls, George and Harry Bailey and how one life can affect others.

Both Bailey boys are good son's doing good and right deeds their own way.

George who always wanted to travel but fate intervenes an he has to stay in town when his banker father dies.

having a really bad year George makes a fateful wish

"I wish I was never born." In comes Clarence angel Jr. grade who’s has been chosen to help George on earth,you see George is a good souls doubting his life and doesn’t believe his is worth zip.

One minor incident in George and Harry’s life disproves elder brother Bailey’s theory.

This is before Harry, younger brother became a pilot in World War II.

As children Harry fell into the Bedford lake that the kids skated over but this time Harry had falling into the frozen lake.

Clarence explains "Your brother,Harry Bailey,broke through the ice and died at the age of nine.

George Bailey angrily declares "That's a lie! Harry Bailey went to war!

He got the Congressional medal of honor,he saved the lives of every man on that transport!"

Sadly Clarence says "Every man on that transport died!

Harry wasn't there to save them because you weren't there to save Harry!


You've been given a great gift, George.

A chance to see what the world would be like without you.

"You see,George,you really have had a wonderful life."

Harry Bailey"A toast to my big brother George. The richest man in town."

The fable,story,or parable tells us every life affects every other life,touches them in ways we’ll never completely understand.

So whatever lot in life one has it up to us to make it better and improve on it and help others too.

Recently,in a fully packed church after talking about a wonderful program that helps millions each year I made a personal plea for a date! Yes,I did online friends.

Those online know how I came up with verbal Cyber-S
racy,intimate language and the women know they egged me on wanting more acting all innocent and sweet at its conclusion yet wanting more of same hmmm,hotline lassies heated me up not knowing I’m both a delicate,passionate, complex,gentle,soul as blood coursing through capillaries made sitting, standing, or laying down difficult.

Shame,shame,on those online Vixen’s taking verbal,mental advantage of someone both visually and imaginatively.

Guy’s know women know how to discretely push our buttons then say "You dirty minded young,middle aged, old, man."

We’re learning your subtle mental tricks slowly but surely.

But enough as I said every life affects others as if all is a tenuous strung web – if one life is no longer their others fall or get jangled in the balance.

To everyone online and off have a safe blessed, holy days,and spiritual, spirited Christmas and New Years.


Donations C/0 Poor Magazine

1448 Pine Street #205

San Francisco,CA 94103

Email: askjoe@poormagazine.org

by PNN staff

The people came - the voices were heard. Histories and Herstories were spoken.

A. Faye Hicks, Carmi Johnson,
Oji Elliot, Byron Gafford, Marvin Crutchfield. Martrice Candler and many more upcoming youth and adults spoke on the POOR Press authors panel at the 2nd annual POOR Press Release Party to introduce their poverty scholarship on issues ranging from racial injustice at the workplace to the plight of the poor single mother.

The day was also informed by Poverty Scholars- The Po Poets Project of POOR Magazine, who spit rhymes from their tome; The houzin Project; Art and Resources on Gentrification, Eviction and houselessness.

So now friends, readers and potential conscious Gift Givers - it is Up To You...please support all these po folks - tryin to be heard.. buy our books... for all your holiday needs and wants... !!! ( see below for on-line POOR Press catalogue)

by Joe B.

Close Ranks Pt. 1/Glide Program Pt. 2

It’s a not-to-bad Monday morning in the second city of lights. Mr. Newsom and Mr. Gonzalez are so close that both are metaphorically if not actually physically sweating Tuesdays election results.

Matt is no pushover and Gavin has run a savvy campaign.

That’s all I’m saying about both candidates being completely A-political myself.

Folks, you have 3-count-‘em 3 days to chose the best person for the post of Mayor Of San Francisco Sunday,Monday and Tuesday.

Three days folks,if ‘ya don’t vote don’t bitch and groan on who did or didn’t win.

Its up to all native San Franciscan’s and transplanted ones from everywhere to send a message how we want San Francisco to be run: for elite social/business multi national interests or rank and file regular working poor families or individuals just wanting to live,work,and raise families.

We must remember historically whom first made turned this wilderness place of mud manure covered streets into a sprawling city.

The were and are wandering artists,rebels, seekers of fame and fortune,disinherited of scions of middle to upper crust families,outlaws, soiled dove women,widows, and widowers,law abiding citizens and maybe a few established business folks.

San Francisco always seemed to be a mixture of all the elements of human endeavors but these days it seems the business interests want the city to oust to keep the workers to a rigid sharp edged bumpy grindstone freezing the mandatory minimum raise as the cost of living continues to rise astronomically.

Some historians might know what happens to the towns that made impossible for families,or individuals worker to live.

They pack up and leave taking with them all their skills, loyalty,and knowledge and these once tough scrappy towns die slow agonizing death or quickly get taken over by desert sand or overrun by vegetation.

I don’t know if I want to live in a Multi National Corporate Owned City constantly looks to the bottom line where citizens become interchangeable cogs in the M.N.C.O.C’s. in cities people are the real infrastructure as buildings,hi-free ways, transportation are more impermanent.

Whatever the outcome folks will adapt,survive, and change whom so ever is supposedly in charge.
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Donations C/0 Poor Magazine

1448 Pine Street #205

San Francisco, CA 94103

Email:askjoe@poormagaz ine.org

by Joe B.

METROSEXED UP Pt. 1.

Yes, its late in the day for this but hey- readers that’s why I say ask or tell Joe cause I don’t know but you out there do.

I’ve been hear the term "Metrosexual" to me it meant persons or persons unknown having freaky sex on trains but looking further into it the correct meaning is an ancient one.

Metrosexual(n.)New English Definition Profile.

Word: Metrosexual
Syllabification
me-tro-sex-ual
Noun,Part Of Speech

metropolis, from Greek "mother city"+ sexual.

Whew,three more things.
Definition:A dandyish narcissist in love with not only himself,but also his urban life style.

Where credit is due: Submitted by Mr. Van Norkov the date submitted Thurs.March,13, 2003
Edited,Thurs. March 13, 2003.

I thank Mr. V. Norkov and Langmaker at www. Langmaker.com for this information.

Not to be sexist there are Metrosexual Women as well.

I don not know how long this so called fad,trend has gone on but it seems to me its another Madison Avenue or other Metropolitan ad campaign to create another sales niche this time for ‘het men who are equally at home with culinary arts and shopping,with wives, sisters,or girlfriends as they are rebuilding vintage cars or working with steal,wood,making cabinets,and camping out.

Why is it its alright for women to where men’s clothes,do whatever they can,change their minds but for men to simply dress neater,take better medical care of themselves its all of a sudden a big deal; because in isn’t.

Channel’s 7’s "The New Masculinity?
Manly Men,Move Over: Metrosexuals Are It.

From Aug.5,2003
Is manure because most men do keep themselves clean, neat,and are respectful of women its just women and most of society ignores the fact when its in their face.

I still see red remembering what a very successful woman lawyer said about men "Their Generic" of course there are exceptions.

This woman granted is beautiful,intelligent and has personal as well as hidden assets that can be used to sway men but all not even most men are the way she deems them however I could be wrong in that the same can be said of women who’s stock and trade are natural or enhanced feminine features that some men pay money to see and not touch.

These women may be college students, studying,law,physics,or criminal justice system using their bodies at night brains in day is a cliche’ but are they generic because of their occupations obviously not but men are generic–hmmm, all things being unequal indeed.

I’ve been thinking of Ms. Meredith Brooks "Bitch" lyrics the 90’s I AM Woman anthem of fierce female freedom.

Well below though it is for and about women lets switch it from I’m a mother to(father)same song about men especially so called new metrosexual males.

I'm a bitch,I'm a lover
I'm a child, I'm a mother(father)

Now remember So take me as I am? Just as women don’t get men because we’re so varied and different they are forever on our asses about something and

So take me as I am
This may mean
You'll have to be a stronger man

As in another lyric Just when you got me figured out-men’s seasons also changes.

We are stronger men to constantly deal with women’s ability not only not knowing what they want but once getting it rejecting it.

From men of the 50’s to the 90’s men have been changing as women have although slower we do change and don’t stop but its funny how as men gain more individual freedom women get anxious do you really want freedom for all or just for yourselves?

When I start to make you nervous
And I'm going to extremes
Tomorrow I will change
And today won't mean a thing


Thanks To Ms. Meradith Brooks "Bitch Lyrics" and www.music songlyrics.com.

This way of the macho man is just as silly a label or tag name as the 1980’s Alpha Male or ‘90’s balanced male so now regular guys learning from women and gay men,also lesbian women in how to be more in tune is as silly.

Is it really a revolution in men’s attitudes or is it what the whole of society ignored it until the market place saw dollar signs and ways to expand their cosmetic industry?

Women talk of societies double standard economically, biologically, psychological,and sociological as well.

All true especially economics even though there are women starting up small businesses and in college than men.

We guys at least most of us grew up being told never to hit girls,women, because its not manly, unfair,and we’re stronger but my hard working single mama also said if they hit you hit ‘em back. Most of us didn’t hear that second warning.

Girls and women took advantage this then in the 70’s and 80’s it’s the same no win situation fight a woman and men lose twice even in a fair fight of equal weight if men win it means nothing to beat up a women but it means the world for women to show up men physically.

The best men can do when challenged is to back off,laugh it off taking the jibes and of course the traditional punch and kick to the balls makes women laugh its funny to them because it show’s we’re really vulnerable people.

Most women don’t want to hurt men but a few do is it any wonder men are careful in martial arts.

Men learn how to hurt, incapacitate, wound,knock out, maim, then kill.

Women because they are constitutionally stronger but physically weaker compared to men women bypass hurt,wound,and go directly to maim-kill mode.(scratch eyes, grab pull at groin hard and fast.)

First women say we kill ourselves in wars, over stress, don’t communicate, show little emotion, don’t touch them or play with their children as they should.

Now that we do and we’re more expansive we’re not a different evolving species named Metrosexual?

Come on it’s the same guys who always dressed snazzy,waited patiently as women shopped and likes cooking but never made a big deal as women sometimes need to.

Its funny that women now worry as straight men get to be butterflies, peacocks,and retain male desire females.

I don’t know about "Queer Eye For The Straight Guy,Its All Relative,or Six Feet Under, shows but it seems women get nervous as heterosexuals too has not only an eye or fashion from but can whip up meals,fix toilets,enjoy opera,cry at romantic movies,shop with girlfriends and wives and still desire them too.

Isn’t it like women to want men to change not placing limits on them until we start looking, feeling better than them.

They want tamed ‘Hets but not to out beauty them in their own realms.

Well,we’re just following you lead ladies (some of us go to far as women do but I notice most women frown on going Dutch for dinner,(equally splitting the bill)rich women still want richer men to marry and won’t dare stoop to dating poor working men,women still can ware men’s clothes and we cannot where yours, lastly in dance clubs ladies go free while men pay.

I know because there are more men than women these clubs. (if its free for women how come less women than men because they can dash from club to club for free and most men are not make of money.)

Yet this unequal societal rule women most wish not to change because they can pick and choose from many men where they (women) are the queens.

Like I said a few columns ago why not have women pay to get in and men get in free at some clubs?

One young female friend said "It wouldn’t work because society sets the rules.

This very svelte, lovely multi racial woman knows the rules are wrong but since it works in her favor it "Oh, well-Joe."

When society sets up ways,rules unequal for one in favor of the other both sexes suffer injustice no matter which is advantaged or inconvenienced.
Metrosexed Pt.II(I want to get off this Metro crud quick)

What do you think about it folks?


Donations C/0 Poor Magazine

1448 Pine Street #205

San Francisco, CA 94103

Email: askjoe@poormagazine.org

by Dee Gray

at poor magazine we ask that our interns "give back"

however, one intern whose origin was never made clear to us had a particular
and abiding interest in helping us by organizing a very Dis-organized closet in our
kitchen. This intern was known for making unfathomable comments like
"the more you do for me, the more Karma it builds up that i owe to you" and the
right pronounication of the name of the Amish people is Aaa-mish", these comments were
punctuated by loud whistles and chirps.

Of course we, glad to have all the help we could get, tended to ignore this somewhat odd
behavior and eagerly left him to claw his way thru the extreme mess of the kitchen
closet.

The closet finished was unbelievable, amazing. It didnt even look like it lived here - sort
of like a space ship thats landing and dropping by to refuel, in fact, each night I have been
hearing banging and crashing in the kitchen, while wierd blue lights flash in the hall -
then an odd pungent smell like fuel burning drifts down the hall. Oddly, the smoke
dectectors dont ring. Im scared. So I dont go near the kitchen. But then, in the morning
everything looks the same.

EXcept that is, for a lite greenish darkening of the paint at the base of the closet
and when the cats Lester, Hands, and Saul come in for their morning Fancy Feast
breakfast, Lesters hair on his tail feathers stand on end. He looks at us and then
the closet, his eyes glistening. A faint knowing meow passes his lips.

He finishes
his meal, and almost unnoticed a large green feather falls from the whiskers on
the left side of his face.

by Joe B.

Glide Program Pt. 2

Besides "A Date That Will Live In Infamy." Spoken by the late President Franklin D. Roosevelt in the aftermath of Japanese Zero’s (Airplanes)bombing Pearl Harbor in the early morning that got millions of Americans in the in 1941. Footnote:
[even though it’s been raging since 1938].

[Didn’t American’s avoid war the World War I 1914 – 1918 by not going at the start but only after the Civilian Luxury Liner Lusitania was torpedoed by a German U-boat in 1915.

Another anniversary or milestone was acknowledged on Sunday in Glide Memorial which began for me last Wednesday.

It was to be my last day working with Mr. Willie Dudley and Mr. David Rivera my immediate supervisors of the HIV/AIDS Needle Exchange Program are first line foot soldiers in the war on SID’s= Sexually Transmitted Diseases.

Me,originally volunteered for inputting data of persons varying in sexual orientations.

It’s the boring data entry most people avoid but I only practiced it years ago as a sampling of what I could be doing as an Electronic Office Manager ‘uh,it’s a glorified Secretary surrounded by constantly updated technologies.

While PC’s are reconfigured,new programs installed I was now filling 1.( Bleach For clean needles for addicts preventing premature death especially for those trying quit.


2. Condoms: (male and female condoms help to prevent STD’s and HIV/AIDS Virus from infecting more people.


3. Hygiene (In clear plastic bags or in black kit bags are Band-Aids, ointment,towelet,water, soap,lotion,cotton swabs, wide rubber band,(for tying off arm,find a vein placing drugs through it, also shampoo,and conditioner and paper with information if further help is needed.

It was my last day Wednesday,Dec. 3, everything goes as usual except about a half hour into my work doing I was asked to sum up what I thought about Glide’s Needle Exchange Program.

Mr. Rivera and Mr. Dudley helped by explaining I already knew what was going and to speak from the heart.

I though "Ok, only 9 am and I’m home free.

Wrong by Sunday I find it’s a tradition to speak twice once for 9 am. and again at 11 am.

This really didn’t set with me well but its better to do this without delay because that same day as part of the ‘PO Poet’s there is a performance at City Hall.

Second row, never been that close to the music, band,and chorus of singer’s I’ve always avoided being to close because the noise.

An hour ticks then my name is called.

On shaky knees I walk to up blue carpeted stairs onto the wood floors.

The words came slow, halting, but clear and then my brain rebels as I hear myself saying
I have had safe sex, some of it against so called nature but I was lucky being monogamous. I don’t drink, smoke, or do drugs,I’m heterosexual and available."

There is laughter, murmurs,then outright cheers,whistles,and claps from many pews and I’m thinking You stuuupid horny ass, Why did you say that at the end of the speech?"

I left dazed, confused, thinking I made a complete fool of myself but also admitted to myself I’ve always wanted to say that because of the if-you’re- from-there-you’re-gay B-S.

Walked home checked message and found my friend from Mills was going to be here to spit her words.

I didn’t want her out in the weather because she sounds like she’s just getting over a head cold and coming out here might make her sick again.

Back a second time I’m sitting on steps leading the stage instead of sitting down when my name is called.

This time was better as I explained what that Glides’s Needle Exchange Program saved lives should be expanded everywhere in every city and town and then my mouth turned against me again!

I don’t know if I said hopelessly heterosexual or simply I’m available want to have a relationship in this city without going to Oakland,Berkeley,or anywhere else.

Its over,after a restroom break I was picking up my coat,hat, looking for my umbrella with its telescoping white plastic cover.

(whew, glad I didn’t say sheath)

First an well dressed elderly black gentleman suggested I see his daughter or was it sister?

A young woman said I’d like to see you giving me her number,we exchanged numbers and emails.

It felt heady,after the exchange I didn’t want to just say thanks because does take courage to ask someone,or tell someone something so in leaving as a gesture and answer I kiss her hand in heartfelt thanks for her act of trust.

I’m given money for a cab to whisk me off to City Hall fast its was only 5 dollars.

Before going to the poetry,I decide to vote that day instead of Monday or Tuesday.

The poetry is outside across from City Hall. I hear her voice with a strain in it.

That means she’s still sick even though dressed up for winters chill and though she says she’s alright as we spend a few hours shopping,taking Muni to Balboa I see her sleeping.

I know she should’ve been at friends,relatives or at my place where she would be alone or both of would be sleeping because I wasn’t feeling that energetic either.

She’ll be visiting relatives,friends all over the country and that she chose to be with me during the day before leaving is something I cherish but won’t admit until asked by her and no one else.

It was a great Sunday, turning church into a huge dating pool is cool and I just had to try it so I did.

Now for on-liners watching I wish everyone a very safe and happy holiday,who knows I may have a few dates this season and be in a budding relationship.

Now that’s a gift that keeps on giving and giving as longs as both participants keep giving of themselves.


Donations C/0 Poor Magazine

1448 Pine Street #205

San Francisco, CA 94103

Email:askjoe@poormagaz ine.org

by Joe B.

Metrosexed II

Looks like everyone’s checking out the next in thing, Its a metrosex fling.

My minor metrosex experience began innocently with a dear friend of mine talking me into a manicure after watching her get one in a shop she decides to "help" me with mine in her home.

All goes well,she in her bathrobe,me fully clothed,leery of all of this but I trust her as a any good trusted friend would.

After a warm soak that wrinkles my hands,fingers cutting nails,then dried with paper towels.

I feel calm,safe,and comfy as her she placed clear nail polish on my clean smooth nails.

"Close your eyes,its alright,Joe."

I Do as she says eyes closed relax feeling safe in her care.

Hands warm,as if floating–that’s when the change up happened!

With a slight suppressed giggle she says "Open your eyes."

"How do you like your nails, Joe?"

I look down,seeing neat,clean,polished,very pretty nails.
(Pretty Nails!)

Too damn pretty because she put bright multi colored glitter on them.

Oh,My,God,I said to myself."

"Why'd you do this? I’m takin’this off... How do I take this stuff off?"

She's laughing,breasts jiggling up,down,side to side (what can I say our friendship is platonic but still this young woman is stunningly,achingly pretty being a straight male I cannot help but notice face,form,and features I also use my brain even though helmet-head has no conscious the head between my shoulder does.

Any other time this would’ve been a delightful sight but my freakin’ pretty nails is the main priority now.

She loves my basic straight guy reactions.

"You can’t take it off, it’ll take a few weeks or months for ‘em to ware away."

She didn’t understand, has no concept of this being a nightmare to me especially living in San Francisco.

I already feel like odd man out in this Gay-Lez– Transgender-Cross- dressing,or other pan sexual city of light by the bay.

I think she couldn’t resist seeing painted glitter straight guy and my reaction to it is a priceless bonus to her and she may have told her other straight or gay fem /men friends "Old Joe is definitely straight,he didn’t like what I did to his nails."

For a few months my bosses,(females)interns, (mostly female)with a few guys too had a great time as I used the PC doing my work.

A valuable lesson was learned from the experience:
either go to a certified manicurist or do it yourself but be leery of friends no matter how trustworthy they are sometimes they cannot help their inner drives.

Would I trust her with money,my life,yes still do but as for personal grooming; I’ll take her tips but not let her implement them ever again.

Flamboyant straight guys-hmmm,almost a contradiction in terms but there are many its only now that society and market forces see them.

Missed a lot about this so called new phenomenon there’s even a "Die Metrosexual Die by Mr. Matt Haber,he writes for www.lowculture.com.

I thought I’d write that so he doesn’t accuse me plagiarism.
"POOR MAGAZINE" Inc." is always at a deficit and this year unfortunately is no different.

I need another column writing job folks and if any of you read them you know "I GO THERE AND EVERY WHERE IN BETWEEN."

With my job at Poor,a Non Profit Organization (a real problem for me-PLEH.)a Art/Spoken -Rap Poetry,

Book making,self publishing entities,our money grows wings not stuffed in bags on trees for us although checks in mail would help a lot especially if some were ear marked to this humble scribe.

Those parties for New Years no way to go to any of ‘em so I’ll be with family (the plan was visit them,go to party, knock boots with a babe or two,then back to family.)


Don’t know if this metro-sexism is another fad,trend or a harbinger of things to come.

Remember,when I talked of Men and Women's brains being more in sync with each other there’d be less friction between the sexes?

Could this be the gender blend not only by gay men and women, transgender folks,it seems the only ones left out are now coming to the fore.

If regular straight guys can really be their true selves without societal pressure pressing down on them does this signal a new psychological day or false dawn?

Are straight values going beyond basic man, women,babies,and the dead, dying stereotype of frozen male privilege too is falling away but it too slow with neo- conservatives doing their last stand dance of Old White Male privilege when even old white males get it and see it’s a dead issue.

I wish the so called current President or the new President to be in 2004 doing something akin to the 1969 Moon Landing.

To take medical science to the nth degree and have life extension as its top priority for 2to3 decades.

If someone not necessarily a President but Vice President, Senator,or anyone with the prestige to begin getting the ball rolling.

It would the moon shot so passe and would galvanize not only America but every nation upon the planet.

The only bad thing is again America will be blamed for upsetting earth on its axis yet again leading nations into a real tomorrow that for now few of us can dimly see.

Happy New Years everyone online and off.

May all of us see the next 1000 years great health,love,and no more wars.



Donations C/0 Poor Magazine

1448 Pine Street #205

San Francisco, CA 94103

Email: askjoe@poormagazine.org

by Joe B.

Award Night Wednesday

Folks,know are in the media biz whether they be top flight professionals, retired,or just beginning to learn what its all about.

There are stressful times when your day doesn’t end because your job does.

A major story turns guppy,minor ones becomes huge and the vacation for you alone or the family that was planned weeks maybe months in advance all of it shot to… you get the meaning.

No family have I except for mother, brother,sister -in-law her relatives now related by marriage.

You see Wednesday’s is almost my one day off to decompress,get away from radio,video/dvd, or reading,hearing what happening around this floating multi color gemlike mud-ball floating in space.

Usually,I sleep late, shower,then volunteer a Glide Memorial making safe hygiene,kits for people dealing with drug addiction,or male and female condoms for safe sex to prevent spreading the HIV/AIDS virus but my supervisors Willie,David, would more up on this they’ve been at it going into communities all over the city for three years

I’m just glad to help in my small way.

When lunch time arrives its either stand in line at Glide or be in St. Anthony’s line this time there’s baked and boiled chicken with potatoes and gravy,broccoli,water with wheat or white bread.

The line is short so there’s a second serving for me I could’ve gone for a third helping but other people need it more so its up five flights of stairs [the elevator is being fixed it’ll take a few weeks.]

I’d see a movie or sleep,get up to practice Salsa dancing before going to Glides Prayer Circle.

After that take an F bus or any bus going to Fisherman’s Wharf then quickly walk to Pier 23 at Embarcadero San Francisco, Ca.

Pier 23 is I go the free Salsa dance lessons from Mr. Fred Flores and his dance instructor’s helping multi thumbed and clay footed folks as I with dance steps.

It feels great relearning dance again with lovely and willing instructors women/men and other ladies too now if I could perspire less but really wanting to be a competent partner for any woman dancing with me plus heat causes it guess going to other clubs would help.

All the above explains why I value being away from my media driven-non profit-job at times.

I do my volunteer work, had lunch, slept instead of seeing a movie provided the C.H.P.[San Christina Housing Project.]

Anyway,there’s this vanilla card "You’re Invited"

Join us to help honor our Catholic Campaign for Human Development Funded Groups

Folks,its my Wednesday -do-good-deed-movie or sleep-Glide Prayer Circle, and Salsa dance night with many lovely ladies.

Usually the mother/ daughter,genetically connected Dee and Lisa Gray would be up there talking about how they’re struggle began and continues to this day.

I go after explaining to the prayer group why I must flee to the Archdiocese of San Francisco.

On time with other people there waiting for the photo electric eye on the sides of the door to let us in.

We’re in and I have to say there in an array of food,pastries,dip,wine, water,and apple cider in a wine like bottle.

Lots of baby carrots, celery,broccoli,cookies, and foods I can pronounce but not spell properly.

Ms. Melanie Piendak is a bubbly,shapely,full figured young woman who with help set up the reception for the organizations honored and spoke slowly,clearly,so that multi linguistic-ly diverse people are translated so all could understand,first in English then translated to other languages.

Others followed her lead in the slow clear speech.

I and other people accepted awards for those who could not be here to accept them themselves.

I hand out my cards, explain what we do and helped with garbage can placement and removal of some trash on the floor.

It was a pleasant event and worth missing one dance night but don’t want to make a routine of it.

Besides Poor Magazine Inc.,The Chinese Progressive Association, San Francisco,ACORN, Myanmar Community Of Unified States Of America, Inc,and Senior Action Network.

After the awards people ate,drank,talked,handed out business cards and announced dates for up coming events.

May all the organizations keep doing their best to help people as we have and we link up to other organizations and continue improving the horizons for many.


Donations C/0 Poor Magazine

1448 Pine Street #205

San Francisco, CA 94103

Email: askjoe@poormagazine.org

by Joe B.

Its Time! Do We want to be Corporate Cogs In
Multi National Businesses as mere consumers?

Or Do We remain free citizens running our lives our way minus secret police,government busybodies dictating how we live our lives?

Well today its up to all of us from 18 to 108 to input our votes and not have policies,laws, initiatives,or proportions rammed down our throats.

We don’t have to eat and swallow any of this crud. So Vote Your Will Folks.


Donations C/0 Poor Magazine

1448 Pine Street #205

San Francisco,CA 94103

Email: askjoe@poormagazine.org

by Joe B.

The Have None’s

There levels of being houseless some people have experienced them all from mental illness with self medicating proscription drugs to habitual drug addiction.

Everyone has a bottom once reached we either crawl or walk away from the gaping abyss or fall further into maybe dying in the process.

Luckily my shallow bottom was having nowhere to stay while writing, being dirty,and getting colds I knew if I kept floating among the shelters in Oakland, Berkeley,and San Francisco one day I’d be so sick my body would finally reach its breaking point and death would claim me.

Other houseless, working poor individuals and families went through more before finding their havens.

The worst level is battling these addictions a once drugs,booze, gambling,and or sex especially the last one can take you off world quicker than walking pneumonia because anyone can be a carrier of HIV or AIDS [Human immunode ficiency Virus/Acquired Immuno-Deficiency Syndrome ] see not feel,be sick,or show symptoms of have the disease.

Then there’s former lover’s who’ve become sick,dying,or have died from HIV/AIDS opportunistic infections that would have been normally shrugged off by antibodies inside the human body but now not only weakens the bodies own defense systems but turns it against itself.
Immuno-deficiency.

Luckier me a second time because of being not particularly strikingly handsome though my equipment was on standby and at-the-ready my lady friends.

I didn’t stray to much and I was always clean because of being monogamous with her only being literally deathly afraid of catching the virus from women in weak one-night stand moments. (Ok,it happened once! ) I’m clear of that as my screenings are negative.

So knowing about sexual Russian roulette my brain kept my helmet sheathed, protected, and celibate.

I disliked being celibate for weeks,months at a time, ball sacks full of sperm with fisting the only safe release option.

That’s why those cyber stories in chat rooms both helped and hurt.

It helped to remember blending fantasy and reality but after such vivid imagery my body responded and it’s a long tortured walk home down Polk Street especially with made up men in women’s clothes and natural ones looking for customer’s.

I’m no superman but between quick death by freezing,heatstroke,being, or murdered in the streets dangerous sex from one night stands men/women (women for me) I’d rather jerk myself staying alive than be a jerk dying either fast or a slow painful disease ridden death.

The thing about having little or no money is you may as well not look at a woman and want her if you cannot take care you own needs.

I chose not to be with one,find shelter,job, learn a few things before dating and being intimate again.

Now that I have a job, apartment,I’m still leery about sex but I know women are just as concerned as I so its always "Show ‘em updated test results before anything and be honest about past sex life.

For me now I’m ready to be porn films as a participant making up for the years of no sex
knowing that they take better care of them selves and aren’t as wild an industry as once thought but how does a lazy eyed, stocky,low wage,short black guy with working equipment get into the porn business? What kind of tests does it take,and lastly if I have the stamina to stay up, maintain an erection?

I think of maintain, enjoy ask what she wants/ needs and continue light,feathery to heavy strokes she'll tell me when she's done with me.

Maybe I’ll get into message and join a legitimate business or be on a cruise ship.

But all of the above trumps being houseless, seeing,without touching females and aching to touch and be touched by them.

Being homeless taught me more values of life and people and if there were any homosexual tendencies they would’ve come out by now.

In jail a bigger, stronger man can rape or kill you,out free in the street its on you to stay alert to survive its all up to you to choose death or life.

That’s why I say I’m hopelessly hetero doomed to like,and love women, though most may never see me that way all I ever needed is one but until that one arrives I’ll be enjoying the sight,smell, taste,feel,conversations of my feminine half.

To everyone have a safe Thanks Giving and watch out for the extra weight.

I like and adore normal well developed fem form, if its not healthy scale back on the goodies, oh-I’m sorry,to me you’re all THE GOODIES.



Donations C/0 Poor Magazine

1448 Pine Street #205

San Francisco, CA 94103

Email: askjoe@poormagazine.org

by Joe B.

Life Extension Calls

Church is over,some work at the office by lunch time means no Free food at Glide’s or St. Anthony’s.

Trail mix snacks will do until the extra money earned this bright, blinding summer-in-winter’s day trick of San Francisco is in my hand.

Earlier in the morning I began rereading a science fiction adventure with continuing character who’s immortal lives span from the early pre recorded history to a far futuristic space faring humanity.

Though it’s a tale well written with characters somehow through an evolutionary quirk found themselves at first to be singularly blessed or cursed with unending life not just very long extraordinary life spans but truly immortal though death may come by misadventure,accident,in the course of time but rejuvenating, regenerative,powers they know nothing of.

They live,learn,love, raise families,fake old age before others find they are deathless beings.

I wonder if somewhere in our predawn, prerecorded history it had happened once or a couple of times in give or take a few billion years.

Evolution has been found not to be slow sometimes its also speeds up though the normal pattern is very slow.

That certain men, women,animals,don’t die in the fullness of time only means that its improbable but impossible not in the realm of evolution arbitrary hand.

These women,men wouldn’t know at first for a long time until certain things occur over time friends,lover’s,family getting ill,growing older, then dying while they themselves retain their vitality whether they are chronologically older their biological time keeps them young.

If they are women plain they or pretty they outlast ephemeral mortal beauty,have many lover’s, and many children and yet their progeny may never inherit the I-gene because it is too early in the human species as mortality is the norm and our mystery woman’s Immortality gene is a recessive trait.

Outliving, rapes, their hymen regenerates to virgin status as broken bones renew,serious otherwise lethal head – body damage rejuvenate though memory taught them harsh lessons on surviving the live and only pass the I-Gene to rare female or male offspring.

Men in battles,wars, find mortal blows to head, hear,in back,ribs,and belly,hurt like hell but rapidly heal without scar tissue.

They to may even suffer the greatest pain (besides giving birth) castration but again re-grow lost organ over time.

Having many lover’s, wife’s,in their incredibly long lives.

Embryo’s born,toddlers, to children,to adolescent, young adult,to mature adult marrying or dying young in street fights or in wars not able to pass their I-G’s except rarely.

The tragedy of many going mad,committing suicide not knowing how to handle what nature,time, maybe a deity or deity’s has given them.

Would any of you out there accidentally found this devastating truth come forward and reveal yourselves?

If it were me I wouldn’t knowing some what people have don’t to each other I couldn’t in all conscious do it unless there were others as I and the search would begin.

Still for me it were me mind you, the most radical course for me was to conspire to turn regular mortals into people such as myself turning rare I-G recessive into dominant but I wouldn’t want 8 – 10 –12 to 15 year old immortals what an accursed abnormal blasphemy
that will seem to many and yet they too might exist without our knowing.

Most of us don’t believe actual walking, breathing immortals exist if they did a few of us would have a difficult time excepting this reality if it were true.

For now we don’t worry because we all know everyone dies that’s the equality of life (mortality) everyone of us will die either young, middle aged, or elderly.

But folks the time is quickly approaching when applied Bio Sciences continue making breakthroughs in slowing, reversing, extending, or otherwise stopping the human aging process; we already think of if as not natural but an accumulation of errors in our genes all the way up to our brains!

What if 3D models down to the molecular subatomic strands of DNA was of all humanity was drawn up and there with minute precision of human’s and micro to nano sized PC’s were able to pinpoint the exact moment human beings begin falling apart?

We find, have those area’s classified and begin meticulous corrections to and perfecting all molecular, chemical, genome in the 3D model human.

Both woman and men can finally borrow which works best in both sexes and improve upon ourselves.
Men would be able to think in tandem using both sides of their brains as women normally do, be more in touch with their emotive sides.

While women would now naturally know why men act they way they do without men trying hopelessly to explain and could physically be men’s equals in physical strength no longer verbally out talking them because men would not know the cues subconsciously as women have been socialized as young girls.

I don’t about any of you out their but I’d like to really able to spar with women verbally in an even tongue battle without smarting emotionally because of the barrage of remembered dates, facts, q+a’s, plus cutting remarks.

Most Women still cannot fight men physically because of the smaller, lighter bone structure, and socialized upbringing it either has to be punches, kicks, or objects thrown at men’s most vulnerable the old nut sack, throat, back, side, or bridge of the nose which can send pieces of nose bone cartilage into the brain and any powerful enough grab-hold or kick to said sack area can easily not only cause great pain, internal damage, but is also lethal.

Most guys if their honest know they’re no superman with balls of steel but only made of flesh and hold their scrotums dear.

Anyone has any ideas to create the I-Gene in us all tell me about it, is it real, or does it have to made in a lab?


Donations C/0 Poor Magazine

1448 Pine Street #205

San Francisco, CA 94103

Email: askjoe@poormagazine.org

by Leroy Moore

Brown gave birth to a wealthy White man, Gavin Newsom

like father like son

holding homeless people as political ransom

Running on oppressive propositions

eight years of sweeping out the brown & yellow men &

women

a Republican in Democratic skin

Green lining their pockets

campaign promises don't make it

into working class & poor people's Christmas

stockings

Make room for a 3rd party

busting up the old dusty monopoly

Matt G speak to me

The two party machine

has many walking around like robots

father and son planted a virus on the ballot

Prop N & M

Gavin Newsom still playing in Brown's shoes

can't produce an independent thought

Clang, clang

Champagne glass in one hand

silver spoon in his mouth

December's runoff

Will kick this dysfunctional family

Out of office

Newsom has an identity crisis

he should be running to the Wizard of Oz

cause he has no heart, soul or brain

Can't understand why Newsom has no respect

for people of color

oh! Cause he was raised by uncle Tom in Uncle

Sam's house

Using daddy's brown costume

to trick his father's loyal followers

like father like son, only seeing big green bucks

Amos Brown, Cecile Williams & the African American

Democratic club

file behind the Man

who hit the jack pot with the race card

San Fran recovering from a conservative, capitalist

creature

dot coms, gentrification & eviction

all happen under Brown administration

The revolution was on

activists & liberal roots

grew on the Board of Supervisors

Taking over City Hall

and the police commission

aiming for room 200

Get off the fence

put your pride aside

push Newsom & his policies-out-of bounds & on the

bench

Money swells in his pocket

while his head is empty

his promises make no sense

Polished & slick

Newsom has no substance

Matt Gonzalez has a compus

to keep the campaign on the right track

away from personal attacks and straight to the facts

A migration of low-income people

but now the tide is turning

with a living-wage ornament

Mother-nature & humanity has a chance

to work together in unity

with the green party

The ultimate balance

take a glance

leave the Brown machine

Go to the polls

Cast your vote

Toss father & son in the Bay with no boat

Like father like son

Bullshit don't float

On Dec. 9th father & son will be going down slow

by Joe B.

It’s been a long Sunday night between a trusted friend’s visit and later I’m bundled up insulated from the cold up as my friend’s other friend left their car lights on too long draining the battery.

20 to 45 minutes later after a few cars and a knowledgeable truck mechanic and taxi driver with jumper cables stopped both good Samaritan’s made it possible to jumpstart the car again and happily to worried people left in a borrowed car to their next destination.

In the morning the radio automatically switched on with new about U.S. soldiers in Tirkit, actually Adwar,a village 10 miles from Tirkit, Iraq capturing a ruffled, ragged,dirty,scraggly bearded Mr. Saddam Hussein in a disguised hiding place 8:30 pm. Saturday, Nov. 13, 2003 local time.

Reports say "He gave up without a shot,with $750,000 American Dollars on hand, automatic weapons of made in American. [some information gleaned from The San Francisco Examiner, a free weekly newspaper].

I’ve heard he (Saddam Hussein) used,drove,or was driven in taxi caps in disguise avoiding capture and that Hussein has doubles running around but its curious how the capture coincides Hali-Burton’s over 61 or more billion over charge of rebuilding of Iraq.

Was the capture serendipity or planned to take pressure off or make people for get billions of dollars in over billing problem.

What about the Ben-O or O-Ben guy(you know) the family, set on a plane flying away a day or
a few hours before September 11th tragic acts.

I’m not saying Iraqi’s, American,and coalition forces aren’t doing their jobs capturing Saddam Hussein wasn’t a priority so is capturing Mr. Ben and other infamous leaders.

Its to damn neat to capture Hussein as Hali-Burton’s hemorrhage money in reverse.

I don’t trust any of this and only one person who I suspect is way older than he seems at least he sometimes lets things slip but he’s gone underground and will contact or visit me when time permits plus knows me to be a trusted friend,honest,with integrity,and incorruptible too boot.

He said he knew me in another life.

He says it will all be well and not to make such a ruckus about temporary set backs.

Time for me to write some relatives,buy presents,and hopefully have a lovely Christmas maybe New Years too.

May all of you on line and off be blessed in health,wealth,wisdom,and whimsy.


Donations C/0 Poor Magazine

1448 Pine Street #205

San Francisco, CA 94103

Email: askjoe@poormagazine.org

by TJ Johnston/PNN Community Journalist

When playwright Joan Holden talked about the San Francisco premiere of her play "Nickel and Dimed," based on Barbara Ehrenreich's nonfiction account of her infiltration of the world of the low-wage worker, she hoped that this production would be "more than a play, but a community event." Holden's dramatization is already developing quite a production history. It premiered at Seattle's Intiman Theater last year and has since trotted the boards at LA, Providence, RI, Minneapolis, Denver, Chicago and elsewhere.
Last weekend, the show opened at the Brava Theater Center following a month-long run at TheatreWorks in Mountain View. Both theaters are co-presenting the show.

I thought about Holden's aspirations of drawing together a community on last Saturday's performance. Joe Bolden, my Poor Magazine colleague, and I observed the diversity of the audience. Joe assessed that the house to be a combination of "money, middle class and no money." Having attended various shows populated by the white, affluent season-subscription crowd, I couldn't agree more. Opening week has already hosted fundraisers for Yes on Prop L, San Francisco's initiative to increase minimum wage, and Health Care for Working Families, a campaign by the California Labor Federation.

The translation from page to stage began when Intiman's artistic director Bart Sher listened to an NPR interview of Ehrenreich about her undercover experiences as a waitress, nursing home aide, maid and Wal-Mart "associate" during the supposed prosperity of the Clinton era. She offhandedly proposed to an editor that someone should get their hands dirty and was quickly assigned the task. Sher decided that it should be a play and commissioned Holden to make it so. The role of Barbara was originated (and is continued to be played) by Sharon Lockwood.

The theatrical version, I must say, is very true to the spirit of the book (and Joe might add that it's true to life). The classic three-act structure was observed where each act represented the stops in Florida, Maine and Minnesota in Barbara's journey. She is aided by an ensemble who double, triple and even quadruple their roles of wage slaves and masters. The players also give new meaning to "running crew" as they adeptly performed quick scenery changes. Among the characters, Susy McInerny stood out as Holly, a Happy Maid who starves for her boss's approval as much as she does physically, and Elizabeth Carter, in her portrayal of housekeeper Carlie, who suspects Barbara to be a spy. The rest of the company (Cristina Anselmo, Julia Brothers, and Rod Gnapp) also find distinct characterizations as principals in the customer service realm. They are ably accompanied by guitarist Michael Goldberg, who put them through their paces as much as director Dan Chumley. A scene at Mall Mart includes a song and dance about the store's "family values." Now, if only Barbara finds out how much they actually pay?

In addition to exploring the nature of shit work (and that topic is literally discussed in a toilet-cleaning scene), Barbara also navigates a difficult course of limited housing and food options. She houses herself in motels and trailers and at one point, avails herself to a food pantry. Projected titles of hourly pay and weekly rent inform what little employees must work with, but Barbara's trenchant observations ("the less you have, the more everything costs you") drives it home.

"Nickel and Dimed" isn't content on just being a latter-day living newspaper. At one point, the actors break the fourth wall and ask the audience who has ever hired a cleaning person and how much they paid them. Rates ranged from $15 to $20 an hour and after a debate among the actors, they concurred that dirty jobs should pay the most!

Barbara initially confronts her middle-class privilege, but the succession of service sector subservience takes its toll. Where manufactured personality exams and drug tests fail, power-tripping bosses and arbitrary rules assault her dignity. "How deep is the corrosive nature of humiliation?" she ponders. "How many times can you bend before the damage sets in---repetitive stress of the spirit?" Even when she stands up for her co-workers, they suspect her of ulterior motives. On the rare occasions where Barbara reveals herself, her co-workers are nonplussed.

"Nickel and Dimed" in its theatrical incarnation has legs and moves so sprightly, its two-hour-plus running time escaped my notice. It engages its audience and celebrates the people who Barbara calls "our major philanthropists" who subsidizes the comfort of others at their own expense. Thinking back to Holden's comments about creating a community event, I must conclude "mission accomplished."

Nickel and Dimed, a co-production by Brava! For Women in the Arts and TheatreWorks, will run at the Brava Theater Center at 2789 24th St (cross street, York) in San Francisco. The show runs through Nov. 9. Showtimes are Wednesdays through Saturdays at 8pm and Sundays at 3pm. Admission is $26 on Wednesdays, $28 on Thursdays and Sundays and $32 on Fridays and Saturdays. Tickets are available at the box office, (415) 647-2822 or www.brava.org. Call Merle Goldstone for group sales, (415) 291-9566. Discounts are available for students, seniors, disabled and union members.

by Joe B.

2nd Thoughts On Perfect Jobs


Careers; tricky are the ways some define,take apart,and in a few cases can end ones life.

Most of my life I’ve had the dream of the perfect job where I didn’t have to do much,have time to be creative so I could read, write,while getting a paycheck every week or two.

It hasn’t worked out that way at all from Construction,Custodial, Lab/Librarian’s aid, Security Guard,Cooks Helper in the Oakland Unified School System, selling solar heat equipment,to Warehouseman, H.H.A./C.N.A Home Health Aide/Certified Nurses Aide,Dietary Aide
and House-sitter to name a few occupations over the years.

That was before becoming a houseless, jobless,non entity living in the streets or in shelters.

Thank fate for room and board from another guy named Joe and his kind wife their shelter was my sanctuary in L.A. and after then The Salvation Army or Sally’s.

At that same time some sick, twisted, individual or group were having their fun slashing homeless folk sleeping in near by ally ways I can still hear screams of help.

Anytime,anywhere,it could have been my turn as the next unsuspecting victim under a knife!

Everyone assumed it to be a man doing few thought of it as a woman and yet females equal in their anger,rage,and disgust easily could’ve done it too especially if they are pretty lure a poor guy away tempting him with more than food and when he’s sleeping sounding- quick,hard,stabs, slashing,and inaudible gurgling as the victim chokes and drowns in his own blood draining our of him.

I don’t know if this sicko was ever found?

‘Um, photography, painting,silk screening, writing stories,columns, and using computers and working with the internet followed yet house-sitting seem the perfect job,or writing columns a few times a week.

What really got me thinking was the lucky stiffs and I mean lucky for those guys working in the porn film industry.

I know about the late John Homes,Long Dong Silver,Savannah,Linda Lovelace and many more unknown to me.

After learning about dead porn stars dying by accidental drug overdoses, misadventures,murder,and suicides made me reevaluate the skin flick business.

Even though I have endurance along with RE [retarded ejaculation] my body and lazy eye would keep a few women from enjoying their scenes even though I’d be up for it knowing that made it less appealing.

I’ll learn the physical and therapeutic art of massage so if the housesit doesn’t work out I’ll have a real hands on job and though I have small hands and have been told they are pleasing and comfortable women’s skin.

My rear was another problem or so I thought until I realized it’s a genetic gift of genes hand down by ancestors,and forefathers to me – who am I to disparage something nature gave me I like ‘em on women they might like it on me besides that having a firm,round ass to be gripped,touched, fondled,poked,is find as long as nails are cut short;a reddened scratched bleeding back in one thing but bloody bottom cheeks I can do without.

So the porn biz as on camera stud star is out maybe behind it,writing scripts,or distribution is what works from me. People,situations,life, all of it changes and so do dreams of the moment when one cannot be realized others take their place.

May be some of my online buds in/out of that it know how it all works but I’d sure like to know if I had what it takes to be in a film or two immortalized on video or dvd formats.

"Joe, your lucky you weren’t killed way back when the Slasher was out and about cutting faces, throats, and bellies.

A wise woman said to me once.

Thinking back angels, friends,and strangers have watched over me.

Also all those women, guys,floating around in cyber space chat rooms, again thanks for all your support,friendship while in those myriad voiced-rooms.

Sometimes I went far trying to tare thru the thin online user/screen names membrane for a real date in real space with a fully fleshed out female and I apologize for putting everyone through that (onliners in chat rooms know of what I speak.

For those celebrating Thanks Giving,Christmas, Kwanza,and New Years may the coming month and after be blessed,safe,and rewarding for you all and for those whom this is but an ordinary day may your days to be long and full of good tidings and the best of great times.

I’ve got to go, get ready for KPFA’s Radio show PNN- P oorN ews Network, Dance or drop-in at Pier 23 but be in bed early dang it, see Alcatraz early on Thanks Giving for prayer celebration,then zip over on Bart to visit mama with at her new place for a Turkey and fixin’s dinner.

I still want to housesit now to see about being bonded.

Well,by folks save, wicked days,and nights to all.


Donations C/0 Poor Magazine

1448 Pine Street #205

San Francisco, CA 94103

Email: askjoe@poormagazine.org

by Joe B.

Lingering Legacies

On bottom right of San Jose News I read about the Late South Carolina’s Senator Strom Thurmond’s hidden Black daughter being acknowledged after decades of rumors.

U.S. Attorney for South Carolina’s Strom Thurmond Jr.
of course at first couldn’t believe this of his father and as dutiful son didn’t believe Mrs. Washington-Williams until she showed evidence by way of cashier’s checks that the elder Thurmond provided financial support and notes from him in writing that he knew he was her father.

Now folks can you understand why Black people have lingering doubts,fears,about white folks in general?

The curse of slaver stained both master, mistress,slave woman and male.

Remember it was the horny master sneaking into a slave’s shack for black berry juice not her going up to the big house.

Some advantages could be had by sleeping with the master as in less work in the fields for her man, child,or being sold but this didn’t work lover’s, son’s,daughters,were still sold to settle gambling or to pay for real estate incurred debts.

As for Black males whites projected their lusts onto them for their own misdeeds hence placing White Women on pedestals while shacking up with slaves.

I’m sure some white women took delicious revenge with one or more male slaves.

How could they not they can do nothing against boy friends or husbands.

What better way for both revenge and resolve than to satisfy themselves with slaves who would not believed on pain of castration, death or both.

Women who were successful in their dalliances of forbidden fruit kept their secrets to the grave maybe selling lover’s or had them killed ridding themselves of the problem,a problem her own heated loins created!

Is it any wonder why Black folks don’t completely trust the Caucasoid race?

How many families have relatives of darker hue not acknowledged?

At least the true humans hunting buffalo, dear,these men and women chose, welcomed and loved runaway slaves,Asiatic, Pacific Islanders too join in friendship and marriage even when laws against it are quickly penned.

When blacks,reds, browns mesh bodies and minds creating beautiful rainbow children.

Its Whites who’s set up arbitrary constructs of beauty and intelligence.

Being susceptible as any human to constant negative reinforcement it’s a wonder most blacks don’t commit suicide because as a people we’ve been literally led to slaughter,accused of being cursed by our very skin, called ugly not sensuously kissed or too well loved by the sun in its younger days and in middle age still loves us.

The Strom Thurmond story only illustrates lingering legacies still hidden either by shame, economic reasons,spite, envy,or family pride.

Anyone have secrets in their family tree? (one never knows until the question is asked)


Donations C/0 Poor Magazine

1448 Pine Street #205

San Francisco,CA 94103

Email: askjoe@poormagazine.org

by Joe B.

A few months ago my internet adventure has begun.

There’s no way to explain how many dumb errors were made in hundreds if not thousands of attempts at logging in at various date sites and though it would be against the law to reveal said sites.

I can say most of them were adult sites and a few were strictly literary where I said in columns what I could not at my regular work site.

The two sites with help from emails to me help me through a difficult time both social and economic.

The first lesson learned is writing down all User,Screen,and or Password names down or its forgotten after disuse or if one is on too many online dating sites.

Images or photo’s took me longer more than a few months first because of crippling self doubt about my own physical looks and second I have few digital photo’s but finally did place one on a few sites.

In chat rooms I pride myself on being honest to a fault but forgot most people do not use their real names but User or Screen names so did I but after at time when chatting became somewhat frustrating because either I kept losing the thread of conversations or the PC would boot me off the system.

So green was I that people did IM me [instant messaging]
Written diction is not as important as being understood,which didn’t make sense until I heard on a sit com TV shows correct spelling is a negative showing to youth of older persons online while misspellings and coded words that youths may use is seen as a positive aspect.

Then there’s Cyber Sex.

I’ve heard the term but didn’t quite know the meaning until I did it myself in chat rooms.

The women there know what I speak of.

I’m the so called weird guy that wrote X-R rated suggestive scenarios from the fantasy job of massaging women and being seduced by them,to wild women on motorcycles being sexually aggressive to men they pick up.

This I though of as erotic online chats not cyber sex with web- camera’s where both parties see each other nude.

I’m informed its all cyber sex.

I thank the women for their indulgence and will not use online pseudonyms.

At the time it was highly embarrassing not only that my mind came up with those stories but that a few them were true.

Then I really went crazy going to lets say sex for sex sake where women and men really want physically hook up and being online is just a faster way of meet-greet- be-discreet for intimate fun.

No, didn’t hook up with any ladies yet and if I did I certainly wouldn’t tell gntle M’s don’t at least that’s the way I was raised.

So what have I learned?
1) Find the sites that fits your personality.

2) Reveal little as possible about self but be truthful.

3) Keep all names,sites, dates, on hard copy.

4) Listen first before write/talking online.

5) Have sense of fun, set hrs. don’t get addicted.

6) Be aware of other sensibilities, be helpful.

7) Read Chat etiquette, rules, ask when in doubt

I learned in virtual realms people are as lonely,lead other lives, want to connect as in real world,and are as
bewildered in the online world as anywhere else.

What will I be doing after my home is PC fixed and have a web cam connection?

It will be face to face without nudity unless we really trust each other doing that.

I always think there’s some unseen third party peeking in on everyone online maybe I’m paranoid but maybe its true!

That F.B.I. carnivore program hasn’t been destroyed just not talked about as much which makes me think its still working stealthy through all the integrated internet connections.

To the guy’s online who’ve warmly welcomed me thank you also though primarily I was there strictly to date and be intimate with females. The men were very kind treating me with gruff, tough love.

At one point I became a greeter for new people coming online and cooling down arguments.

I still don’t know if the Boudoir (Finally spelled it right!) became full in daytime as well as night was my doing after trying out a test or has it always been full?

Anyway it was a frustrating,exasperating, also exhilarating,time and was/is worth all the goofs I made fumbling through also at the same time I was getting my teeth cleaned, scraped,and worried about an upcoming operation.

I’d like to tell them I’m keeping them stain free, eating less meat, and found a place to learn Salsa dancing. (cannot tell where only that its in the City.)

If I with my inept way can get have women talk, I M me then anyone can do it.

And if any of the men or ladies from the online date site is reading this column,could you tell them where to find it so they can email me without going through the date site. I know, Joe you a sneaky devil.

Well,that’s it and though I may rarely talk about chat rooms or cyber sex I’ll check ‘em them out and what happens discreetly between me and others in future will not be known to anyone they and I,as I’ve said before gentlemen never tell.

Any online folks at those date sites can if they want can contact me (intimate dating I hope, no kidding).

Donations C/0 Poor Magazine

1448 Pine Street #205

San Francisco, CA 94103

Email: askjoe@poormagazine.org

by Staff Writer

An excerpt from the Introduction...

"This book is for all women who are in positions of power, who are not assertive but strong in order to handle any situation brought their way. To these women I say - Never give up. Thats's what "they" want you to do..."

by Tiny/PNN

2000 arms outstretched upwards, angled right..reaching|.reaching their eyes tilt slowly toward the sky, and then He appears, "Ar-nold, Ar-nold Ar-nold!" their collective voices climb to a solid chant "AR-NOLD AR-NOLD ARRRRRNOLD!!!!" The thin asbestos walls of the strip mall parking lot in Tracy , California tremble under their weight

It has been thirty days since governor Arnold Schwarzenegger took office and as one of his claims as a candidate stated; ACTION ACTION, ACTION!!!, he aims to fulfill his odd promise. Although this sounded like the bubble comment of a cartoon action figure rather than a gubernatorial candidate, since he has taken office he has launched a series of fascist attacks on the weakest members of our society. First he made quick work of the immigrant drivers license legislation (killed it), proposed severe cuts to the in-home support services provided to disabled Californians as well as several other drastic cuts which would affect disabled folks, and most recently proposes to suspend spending to California's school funding guarantee.

Ever since he began his run for governor I have been nervous of Schwarzenegger's vague Nazi background and fascist tendencies. He asserted from the beginning of his run, buried under all his terminator-like sound bites, that he wanted to cut services out of medi-cal all the while providing increased advocacy for the ever endangered Hummer (a war-like vehicle that he purports to own several of). When he perceived opposition to his fascist budget cuts he decided to take his budget "on tour" receiving a HAIL(Heil) ARNOLD chant from every clueless California enclave he visited. The San Jose Mercury News described Arnold as a populist. Wasn't there another Austrian power hungry politician described as a populist that illicited blind faith from his "people" no matter how fascist his policies became

Well, yes I said it Hitler lurks in the populist murk that is Arnold, and Hitler's first choice for the death camps were disabled people, the mentally ill and other assorted "misfits" If you think I'm bitter, you're wrong. As the sole caregiver for two disabled family members who fall directly into his proposed cuts categories, I am scared.

ACTIONARNOLD is proposing to cut all benefits for people who use in-home service providers who are family members and as well, all service provision to any disabled people who are ambulatory, i.e. if the only in-home services you receive are for cooking, driving to medical appointments, cleaning, laundry, help with bathing, etc

Now the frightening thing about his choice of what to cut is how these cuts directly impact and increase the poverty of poor people and families of color, i.e., those of us who refuse to ever consider putting our elder family members in "homes" but wouldn't have the money to take care of them without the meager stipends granted from In-home support services and/or folks with disabilities that don't render them in a chair but whose lives depend on the driving, cooking and/or errand running of their in-home aids because without that help they wouldn't eat, get medicine, have a bath, or see their doctors/caregivers.

As well, many daughters like me who transitioned off of welfare to non-existent "work" in the big welfare (de) reform dayz of the 90's were able to earn a living wage helping their family members with basic needs, as well as bring their entire families (elders, children, adults) up and out of poverty together. But of course, these family-based solutions which help the "whole" family rather than just the individual wouldn't be attractive to ACTIONARNOLD champion of Capitalist/Fascist values.

Finally, as disabled folks and their advocates fight to preserve these basic services and defy the cuts, I hope that all Californians will speak to their Tracy-dwelling relatives and friends, eager to line up with outstretched arms and let them know that AR-NOLD is no longer a harmless pretend action figure but in fact, is a fascist leaning government official and we all need to worry what AR-NOLD's next form of ACTION ACTION ACHTUNG will be

POSTSCRIPT; As of press time the Democrats in the House negotiated a slight compromise - which is to hold off on the budget cuts to health and welfare services until the next session which begins on January 8th. It is VERY Important to call your local legislator and let them know how you feel about these dangerous cuts as well as to call Arnolds office at 888-780-9275 press #8 and leave a message.As well there will be two press conferences/protests sponsored by a several economic justice coalitions in the Bay Area; Thursday @ 10:00 am 845 Jackson Street ( bet Powell and Stockton )
and 11:00 am Mission Neighborhood Health Center 240 Shotwell Street (bet 16th and 17th)