Story Archives 2018

Get out her Bitch I know You're In there Let Me In …  ………………………………………………….

Damn I SHOULD I HELP MY NEIGHBOR .. WOULD SHE TURN ON ME ??? That's the sound of an abused women ……………………………………………………

Too Often One Can Hear the Ruckus and Abuse Through the Wall …………………………...

You Can See The Abuse Worn On HER Face When She Leaves Out of the House …

She Use to Stand Up Tall and Switch When She Smiled You Can See the Sharpness of her Check Bone  

And When She Passes by You Can Smell His Calone COMING through Her Pores … She's Loyal ……………………………………………………………………

But to Who Not TO Her-Self Thats For Sure and  to add insult to Injury … If You Asked Her If

she is MORE THAN ok ...SHE will Tell You She's QUITE ALRIGHT … In fact she's Just Fine … AS

She Smiles With A CONFLICTING CONFIDENCE ...She Is NOT FINE She Is HURTING IN silence  ……………………………………………………………………

No ONE Knows Yet Every One KNOWS ……………………………………………………….

Who Will Take A Stand ? … And For What Are we taking A Stand For …?.. I Mean Fuck How

Do we Reach Her HELL How Do WE REACH HIM ...Clearly THEY WANT TO BE TOGETHER

And JUST BE LEFT ALONE …

After All Its NOT A Problem Untill She SEES IT TO BE A PROBLEM or HE SEES IT TO BE A PROBLEM ………………………………………………….Right ??? …………………………………..

Is It THE Village Problem …….???  I say YES ...

Is It THE Village Fault ………..???? I Say YES ...

Do We Call THE Police  ????

Do We Hold A HEALING Elephant CIRCLE ???

Or Do We (NOT ME) Get RID Of HIM ???  A Vigilante ???

Mehqueena had been coming home all week frustrated and all her confidence in school system gone.. She had been harassed in class by two girls whom had been filming her and posting up rude comments about her. When Queena tried to tell staff at the school what was going on, she was made to feel as if she was the instigator and that the possibility of her being bullied by these particular girls was farfetched. She was made to feel like if these girls did not like her it was because of something she had done.

At her wits’ end, Queena became angry and declared that she will defend herself if no teacher nor staff will do an intervention.  Meeting after meeting, the staff at Everett Middle School’s attempt to deal with the situation failed miserably. The alleged bullies were being praised more than disciplined and one staff “took sides” with them enabling them with more power, one girl because of her “beauty and popularity”.

It was impossible for Queena to concentrate at school, and she even asked if she could be moved away from the same classroom as these girls but to no avail. She even asked could she do all her assignments in the office, but as hard as the 12 year old tried to remove herself from this issue, Everett staff did not accommodate Queena at all. Instead Everett staff insisted that Queena was the problem and she was treated like an angry, black criminal that did not have the same rights at the school as the other children. Meaning throughout the whole time Queena was punished for reacting to her bullies’ actions. There is no way that a beautiful popular latino girl could bully a 12 year old black girl. Really? So what does a bully look like?

“The adults at Everett were bias towards me, they made me feel like a nigger.” Queena shared with POOR Magazine.

Queena’s anger caught the attention of the staff but not as a child who was fed up with being bullied but more like the angry black child who fits the description of being the bully herself.

“When I got upset and said that I will fight my bullies back because no one would do anything, I was punished by suspension. I had to fight back for my safety. They called my mother every day because of something that they “heard” from the other girls that did not like me. I didn’t have to be at school and I was being put into some mess that did not have anything to do with me. I do not like that school. They tried to break my spirit by being unfair but my mother supports me” Queena said in a coy tone.

She fortunately no longer goes to Everett Middle school after being pushed out. Queena was so fed up with Everett staff letting her down that she stopped going to school altogether for a brief time.

“I saw this coming a mile away, that Everett allowed for Queena to catch hell at their school then they failed her. Queena wanted to be at school and she was upset that she was not able to do her finals at school. Instead she was labeled a drop out troublemaker and sent to 44 Gough street and all the while the alleged bullies continued to go to Everett uninterrupted and allowed to bully on another girl, Queena’s cousin Daione.  So I removed Daione from that school, too.”

After going down to 555 Franklin street several times to file a complaint and to get a safety transfer for my daughter. Not only did the alleged bullies call some high school girls up to Everett to fight Queena, but the ultimate slap in the face was when I complained about the school being bias because the accused bullies were latino , the man behind the desk, that shares similar culture with the girls hurriedly dismissed the “bias” saying “no, no, no we are NOT going to go with the bias. Just the high school girls coming to the school for your daughter.”

He wants us to act like the bias experience never happened. I don’t think so. We are going to tackle this whole issue that puts children of color against each other in the first place, right along with the intentional miseducation.  As a POOR Magazine advocate I don’t know how to feel when I am related to everyone. It is hurtful when you are hated for no reason. Then this has to be explained to children such as Queena, who hurts just as much because she didn’t understand how the staff would smile and act like they care but their actions, no matter how cleverly hidden showed otherwise. What does a bully look like?

Queena is a former student of DeeColonize academy and is educated in political science. She has written stories on racism, gentrification and poverty and she is a popular dancer. Queena is feisty and will call out any wrongdoing and owns up to her mistakes. She was taught not to bully and to speak up when something is wrong. Queena said that how she was treated at Everett Middle school was wrong and she felt left behind.

Queena is right.

How to Stop Living Out of Your Car

How to Make the Most (Financially) Of Your Military Career

Housing Options - Shelters through Transitional Housing Options

Homeless Bill of Rights

From Construction Sites to Constructed Homes (for Homeless Vets)

Homes for Homeless Vets: Giving America's Heroes the Support They Deserve

Directory of Pro Bono Legal Aid

Legal Advice for Homeless Vets

Guidance for Veterans' Mental Health

Food & Medicine for Pets of the Homeless

StreetLink

Soldiers Off the Street 

UK Ex-Services Members - Housing Help

A Veteran's Guide to Health and Nutrition

(Subscribe to Tiny's Podcasts from A Poverty Skola on this and other stories-by clicking here: https://www.spreaker.com/user/povertyskola/resist-ice-with-unseen-whiteness)

Daughters and suns crying, hardworking fathers and mothers lurched from their children’s arms, families stolen, babies traumatized . Oranges dying on the trees, grapes shriveling up, un-picked, un-gathered and uncared. All of these acts of violence against mama earth and her earth peoples happening because the hard workers, the migrante indigenous labor that the multi-billion dollar farm industry relies on to pick , care and distribute its products are being deported across the hate-filled colonizer borders. Borders created, enabled and enacted by the forefathers of the farm industry families themselves. To this violent paradox i propose an emergency form of Ag-Reparations and Farm Sanctuaries. 

No matter how you say it reparations is Everything. its mere consonants make most middle class wite people shudder, extreme wealth-hoarders silent, and politricksters of all stripes shut down. And yet it, i will repeat, is everything. In the case of the use, theft and profit that fuels a stolen capitalist system launched by what i affectionately call the “Stealing Fathers” there are direct through lines between enslaved bodies, indentured bodies, indigenous bodies and poor bodies to the wealth-hoarding, land and resources stealing and accumulation of the very rich and even the middle class in amerikkklan.

In our 21st century reality there are different kinds of reparations and radical redistribution that must be enacted. These are acts of conscious reparations and revolutionary redistribution- in other words what must be enacted is an actual “sharing economy” rather than the fake uber-lyft-google-face-crak sharing of basically nothing)

These acts of radical redistribution and real sharing are what I have deemed Community Reparations. it is rooted in the concept of inter-dependence and the recognition that we are all connected as humans and all need each other to be ok, and unlike the fake and inhumane notion of Independence that the Stealing Father gangsters called the declaration of Independence and other associated documents, Interdependence states that i am connected to you because you and i are both human, because i see you, you and i have a responsibility to each other and i can no longer practice what i call “ the Violent Act of Looking Away,” This form of inter-dependence, radical redistribution and Community reparations is what we teach people with different forms of race, class and formal education privilege in POOR Magazine;s PeopleSkool. It is what funded and helped to implement the poor and indigenous people-led movement called Homefulness.

These acts of radical redistribution look like POOR Magazine’s Solidarity Family and the Zapatistas (EZLN) Comite Apoyo (Support Committee) both of whom alternately use their multiple “paper” privileges (academic papers/letters/ so-called “citizen papers” or documents”, deeds of trust claiming they own land and credit) to support, lift-up, launch and leverage with us folks who have none or maybe only one torn piece of that paper.

Homefulness was not launched with bloodstained dollars alone, any one of our Solidarity family will tell you that its developing horizontal magic of poverty skolaz working along-side folks with race, class and/or formal education privilege came from peoples whose families know someone who knows someone from years of wite privilege and unseen academic privileges and connections speaking up for us in the permit departments, helping unconnected poor people without a pot to piss in , get credit so we could get new or decently working vehicles, helping us meet people in the annals of settler colonizer real estate snake halls and meeting other folks with hoarded and/or stolen wealth so we could teach them about reparations and redistribution.

As a matter of fact, most of this work is rooted in deep relationship building, which only comes if one person truly shares gifts they were blessed with due to 525 years of white supremacy and insitutional and community power and paper privilege.

In this moment with literally thousands of indigenous peoples crossing the kolonizers borders due to poverty, violence, genocide and war, being threatened with removal, more violence, incarceration and family separation, I am putting out a formal call for the multiple paper privileged among us to practice this form of reparations.

For the conscious people who engage in the farming industry, who work really hard to create an organic, GMO-free product, who try to conserve water, use safe or non-toxic fertilizer, who are trying to, as their marketing campaigns state, stand up for Mama Earth and her earth peoples could create a farm based coalition to stand up for migrant workers who pick their products and without whom there is no working , thriving farm system.

It is for this reason i call out to the farm peoples, the agri-business owners, and lobbyists and even to the community gardeners to create a different coalition to stand up to the Trumpkkklown with your multiple paper privileges and say hell no to the poltricksters and the Po-L- ICE To create multiple Sanctuary Farms across CalifAztlan, deeming your private property (which is privileged more than anything else in amerikkklan aka stolen Turtle Island, thanks to the Stealing Fathers documents, and say no Po-=L-ICE you can’t come on this land and steal, abuse, displace and remove humans ( aka deportation)

There is a similar case i make for the TechReparationsFund, which I put out to conscious members of the Tech industry, last month in our powerFUL Stolen Land/Hoarded Resources Tour thru SillyCon Valley to realize the direct impact of your industry on the lives and homes of working class, poor communities of color in the Bay Area like 100 year old black Elder Iris Canada, killed by the abuse of unlawful eviction,  so pay into a fund that supports the building of equity for working class poor, black and brown Bay Area residents so they can stay here.

In the end none of these acts of reparations, and actual sharing can happen without the moves of privileged people, but my argument is that in these times the moves of conscious peoples with privilege aka different forms of Community reparations such as the Bank of Community Reparations,  and the recent move by Planting Justice to reparate their Ohlone/Lisjen Land to Ohlone /Lisjen peoples of this land (Oakland) are what must happen now - meanwhile us unhoused, Po, criminalized and indigenous folks at Homefulness who are actively wrking to liberate this small part of Mama Earth from the Real Estate Snakkke industry while also publicly naming Homefulness as Sanctuary land, and Sogorea Te Land Trust, the 1st Native Women owned land trust can create our own self-DeterminATION movements of land, resources liberation and decolonization across stolen Mama Earth.

For more information on this proposal or for help launching either the TechReparationsFund or the AgReparations/ Farm Sanctuaries email poormag@gmail.com. For mroe information about the next session of PeopleSkool go to www.racepovertymediajustice.org

(Listen to tiny's extended Podcast on the same story by clicking here)

“They used to make me fight with the dogs for food…” My mama eyes would drop into that shaded place, where stories always led to other violent stories of her abuse in a string of tortuous foster homes that she spent her entire childhood in. Stories like the middle class white couple who were abusing their adopted children of color for years with barely even anyone noticing until they drove them selves and three of their children off a cliff last week

My mixed race, Afro-Boricua, Irish orphaned and tortured mama never wept, just like she never hugged or touched or kissed. She did yell though and scream and curse and punch and kick and throw. Thats all she knew , thats all that had been done to her in all those foster homes and eventually the orphanage for “poor girls” she was placed in. I don’t tell this small slice of my poor mamas painful story to reminisce. Actually even writing it brings me back to the helpless silence i felt when i would hear her string of violent stories, unable to, as i wanted, take away all that hurt from her body and soul.  I tell them to illustrate the impossibility of the system that criminalizes , destroys and separates families based on class, race and ancient eugenicist based policies.

The foster /adoption/CPS , Juvenile Dependency court system in the US is rooted 525 years of missionary lies, colonial theft of land, spirit, traditions and mothers and finally the post-colonial concept of eugenics (pure race science the Nazi’s learned from the US). This country and other so-called developing countries have been stealing, pillaging and removing children for profit and lies for a long time under the guise of the sentence and its many variants, “Its in the best interest of the child,”

Sadly i don’t know the back story of the six children who were adopted by these two women and are now dead and disappeared. What i do know is some agency or series of agencies decided that these two middle class ( possibly upper middle class) white women with no relation to the childrens culture, community or spirit were seen as “better” than their homes of origin.

The decisions to remove children from their homes, parents of origin happen in many different ways which are ALL rooted in class privilege. If the birth parent or parents are seen as “unstable” which is code for many things, all class related, i.e, homelessness or not having stable housing, not gainfully employed, not educated, or more subtle like acting ghetto, angry, or frustrated in front of the anti-social work industry, you risk losing your child if the system is in your life.

The sick, sad, classist paradox is these multiple systems will grant foster parents and group homes up to $4,500 to raise your child ( and often times much higher is the child is disabled or Severely Emotionally Disturbed) and yet you, the parent, is given nothing but grief if you admit your poverty and struggle to the system.

And again this notion of best interests of the child comes from a missionary, colonizer long-held belief that mere access to wealth deems you a better parent than someone poor. It is why they have long been forcing sterilzation on poor and indigenous women who have children, conflating with race as well when it comes to the evil or colonial beliefs about white supremacy and class supremacy

My mama’s mama was encouraged by multiple so-called social service agencies and the state to give up parental rights to her daughter. She was never offered support for raising her own child , Rather, then like now, their was a financial incentive to take children from their homes and parents of origin and her poor catholic, guilt -stricken, domestic violence victimized and confused teen parent self was criminalized and shamed for being undeserving with titles like "Out of wedlock" and bastard child in referring to my mama, her daughter, not to mention the shame of having a mixed race baby Today CPS recieves 12,500 to remove children from their parents. Something my Mama Dee and me and other poor parents WeSearched in 1999 and published in the Courtwatch project of POOR Magazine.

But the real place that white supremacy plays in, is the way that these white women with class privilege were even granted the ability to adopt these children without being subjected to a psychiatric evaluation like us poor folks are systematiclly given when our children are taken away from us and when these women were obviously abusing these children of color.

Similar to one of my mamas most evil foster parents who was a rich white woman who systematically raped and physically and mentally abused my mama for over 5 years of her childhood ( from 4-9 years old) and was never caught for it, these women seemed to go un-phased and un-watched when they perpetrated abuse on their adopted children and only had to pick everything up and move into more and more isolation where no-one seemed to even look in on them. Allowing these wealthy white people to go un-checked in their violence and insanity, because they weren’t reliant on the state for support.

That said, i do not have an answer as their are many mamas, who like my mama used to say, don’t have the mama gene, so lets not rush to the only answer being all children should stay with birth parents, but what i do say is we could cut at least %50 of these racist/classist adoptions and CPS removals if we were changing the way this system supports poor parents to raise their own children. This is some of the WeSearch all of us welfareQUEEN's at POOR Magazine have been doing for years and their are many powerful Black and poor parent led movements across amerikkklan who have been proposing and fighting these abusive systems for years

In San Francisco in the 90’s they used to have a model/demonstration program for poor black families that actually “fostered” the whole family with a foster grandparent, encouraging and enlisting the strength of African and indigenous deep structures of kinship to support the whole family into healing rather than further the cult of separation that runs thru the CPS and Foster care systems all across amerikkklan. Something my mama uncovered in the landmark POOR Magazine Volume 4 MOTHERS issue in her interview with Black dcholar Wade Nobles.

"She tried to kill me multiple times, Im not sure how i got out of there alive, once she found out having me didn't fit with her image of the perfect mother and child and no-one ever seemed to care," my mama's voice trailed off in one of her re-telling sessions with me and then she just stopped talking about it at all leading her to become more and more trauma-filled and depressed for the rest of her life . I hope that this horrible story, like all the other horrible stories that rarely if ever get told could lead to a different path of care for parents in poverty.

Got dammit!!! SH! Mutha%$*@#! Son of a bi&@! Fu*#@ you!!! Bastard! I wanna die!

The yelling, spitting, lashing out and the disregard of the public when one defecates in between two cars, the drug use, the drinking while sitting on the piss stained curb- the hopelessness period.

Walking through the streets of San Francisco these days one is guaranteed to see the pain and  hear these phrases of despair from the city’s mentally ill, forgotten, unattended to and gentrifuhked. Folks walk past either without a care or too busy to even notice the hellish pit that the poor, homeless and  people of color are slipping through like quicksand while 85% of the poor suffer from mental illness here in the city along with the ever growing rate of substance abuse. Eviction, job loss, community violence, displacement an inhumane “justus” Sssystem- all of the above are major contributors to the stresses that can break a human being’s spirit in half.

The long office wait for SSI crumbs that has people leaving frustrated literally screaming mad. And the #1 complaint is representatives of these departments of human services who treat those in need like vermin that should be squashed.There are some compassionate employees in the field of trying to help those who cannot help themselves, but there are some who look their noses down with snooty attitudes and take pride in getting a paycheck for robbing other human beings of the little dignity and fight a person may have left. “I’d rather stay in the damn streets in my tent where I don’t have to deal with case managers treating me like a toilet bug!” One houseless skolar shared with me and it is the same as I spoke with other skolars that they would rather be out in the streets than to go through a ridiculous system with degrading accommodations and a 6 A.M check-out to nothing but foggy cold air and a liquor store.

The programs now set into place needs to be more consistent and aggressive in the aid of those who really cannot help themselves. The people need more long term inpatient mental health/substance use treatment programs and access to housing, education, healthcare and other preventative services with the chance to become viable functioning citizens again without having to endure 10 year wait lists. I was always told that every problem has a solution, and if we can build top notch stadiums for die hard sports fans we can tackle the problems of houselessness, mental illness and other forms of systematic trauma.

Political dictators make a fuss about how there’s not enough money to fund the programs we need so we can get ourselves together. There is no such thing as “no money” just “misplaced funds” that will never make it to po’ folks who really need it, but we have an ice-cream museum and Frisco always somehow come up with big money to spend on everything that shuns our down and out even more.

While the powers that be scramble around with the back biting game of who’s gonna run this town without money, POOR Magazine puts in the work of heal groups and educating folks to have understanding and to hold love for our people who have no one else or no reliable services to assist in the process of healing their lives. It is extremely difficult to hold love for someone who probably has never felt love before and it is difficult to keep my own panic attacks and trauma triggers in check when myself or children are being accosted by a person who can potentially harm us, but don’t mean any harm at all.

But if this epidemic against the poor continues to be ignored I will continue to believe that the people in office are the ones with the real mental health illnesses because who in their right minds would just sit back and allow for people to suffer?

QUEENNANDI PNN

Thousands of students from schools across the nation walked out of class today in protest for more strict gun regulations. From the Bay Area to Florida, the students’ voices were loud and clear that gun violence in schools must stop and the laws must be reformed. The children walked out for 17 minutes in honor of the 17 innocent people who was shot and killed at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High school last month by Nikolas Cruz. There were marches, student speakers and supporters alike who came out to express anger, sorrow and hope for change. The tragedy at MSD high follows past mass shootings like Columbine high, Sandy Hook and Oikos University and so the question is how many of our children will have to be sacrificed before at least one politician take a stand and the stroke of a pen to declare ENOUGH!!!?

I wish we could go back to revolvers and greenbacks, maybe there wouldn’t be this much death and debt. I have nothing to say against the citizen who has the right to defend his/her family and livelihood, however the easy access that is made to those who have no business with any form of a gun needs to be addressed… and like YEARS ago!

Young and older people alike with mental health crisis’ they are dealing with need treatment, not riffles. The word is that the prosecution in Cruz’s case is seeking the death penalty for the 17 lives he just snatched off the face of the earth. Another version of the cycle of the hate that hate produced and if he is to be put to death how will that deter murderous rage and mental illness..? The non-reality version of the world is the only reality some children and young adults have, then add less, broken or no parental guidance and all the horrors of life man inflicts upon his own wrapping us up in the tentacles of capitalism all there is are the “Shoot em up” video games and the insanity of television programming.

All the messages of morality, sanity, love and looking out for the helpless has been lost and all those kids who took to the streets showed remarkable courage by taking the stand to be the change the world needs and the future must be protected.

Questions that should be in the conversation regarding our future is what’s a person just being a “bad” person? What is a person with “mental illness”? What is a person who’s “easily influenced”? and what is the person who’s  just “pissed off”? What is the “diagnosis” and why does everything has to have a “diagnosis” today?

This system is not working for the people at all and it will continue to fail so long as we have a “system”..  A Classist, Racist, and Selective society who brags of great weaponry and wealth but Miss Amerikkka’s children can’t even learn properly and safely at school. There was even talk of some disciplinary action towards the students, like the walkouts being marked as unexcused absences just punishing the kids for what they believed in instead of the schools interacting with the students and broadening their minds to ensure that the movement blossoms.

The desperate need for gun control goes around in full circle because those that are supposed to uphold the law can’t even control their guns so where’s the examples to be set? We are living in a military country with schools that unsafe and folks that are unstable and a tweet-king-krazed president so as we say to the brave, young warriors coming up in this gun oppression: The Struggle Continues.

QUEENNANDI PNN

Image: Students from Oakland Technical High School stand up against gun violence on March 14, 2018, one month after the school shooting in Parkland, Florida, killed 17. (Samantha Shanahan/KQED)

“Who cares about who you are screwing, its the other things that you are doing!

We the oppressed do not care about the prez and his son’s sleazy affairs!”

The President and his son, Don Jr. has been getting heat lately for their alleged affairs outside of wedlock. Donald Trump, Sr. and his “affair” (with booty star) Stormy Daniels and his son’s alleged “affair” with Aubrey O’day got the media buzzing and the tweeters tweakers tweeting.

If Amerikkka crowned the Kardashians the “First Family” of reality TV then why should Amerikkka care about these “Don-Dons” running around chasing tail? “Morality” wasn’t a requirement to becoming president of the United States, and if it was Ole Don probably would not be the leader of the land of confusion.

There are many, many problems that the country has on its plate and no one should be blinded by who’s doing who and be more concerned with the nut that’s been screwing us all and doing this country into ruin?

With alleged fishy dealings with Russia, not being able to keep a stable cabinet, attempting to rally up billions of dollars for a border/oppressor wall, drilling into Mama Earth, irritating the Chinese with billions of dollars in goods blockage and the continuing agenda of oppressing US has me NOT thinking about what the “Don-Dons” are doing with their combined age of around 111 years old in man parts!

With no gun control, safe, proper education -especially when it comes down to accomodating people of color and ongoing assassination cuts to services for the poor again WHO CARES about who you are playing “old roads, rocky lanes” with in the bedroom? No one should except those involved and those flings that stand to gain a profit from the deeds.

Just plain nuts, Man!

With a special thanks going out to Bush and Don, one of the qualifications of being a leader should be that each candidate have a psychological exam, a morality, test, a non- morality test, a who is? Mother Nature test, a finance test (to see if you can budget $$) and about 15 other test because when you have a country in your hands that is a task to be taken seriously and elements to be respected.

The Prez also has kept the “tweetie birds” over people’s heads with his anti-immigration bias that he has, even against citizens whose grandmothers were born on this blood-stained soil. Such hypocrisy and again confusion from a man whose parents migrated to this country and (along with) two out of his three wives! It is like a beast who just crushed his genetic memory bank completely and vows to give hell to anyone who dare migrates here in search of  “The Selective Amerikkkan Dream”

That is why POOR magazine’s “DeColonizers Guide To A Humble Revolution” was born because we cannot allow for unstable, racist horny men to run and ruin our daily livelihoods. Self-determination and Inter-dependence is of the essence if the people are to survive mentally, spiritually and physically because the imperfect people that are in imperfect power are upping the ante on killing, oppressing, colonizing and incarcerating the people like never before, because this way of running the lands (world) has always been part of so-called “Massa’s plan”

Greiving Mother March 16 2018

AudreyCandyCorn aka Sistah Save A Soul

Today i rode the Bart and im not sure how i feel about it. Honestly i mean i shoudn't even be riding this public transportation …

I'm TRIGGERED TOO Many People Have Lost their LIVES Simply Commuting to Designated PLACES of Importance ………………………………………………………………………………………………..

1st Oscar Grant  And Now Shaleem Tindle …… Not  to Mention My Own Grief After All My Son Torian Dajour Hughes TOO LOST HIS LIFE 2 Blocks up the way-way from This Bart that i Will be Traveling On today ………………………………………………………………………………….

Mixed emotions and it dosen't Matter These Day If you Are a Law Abiding Squeaky Clean Citizen ………………………………………………………………………………………………..

Every One OF Us Are Under Attack ……………………………………………………………..

By These Negative EVIL Low Vibrations LURKING to Conqure and KILL  ………………….

Im just Sick to My STOMACH ………………………………………………………………………

Ooo nooo ANXIETY is Creeping upon me …………………………………………………………

My Chest Is Tight ……………………………………………………………………………………….

My Throat CLOSING UP …………………………………………………………………………….

My TEAR Ducts Are Filling UP Quickly ……. My Vision Is Blurry ………………… MY Temperature Is Rising  ……………………………………………………………………………………………….

My Hands Are Clammy and Shaking ……..  I Can FEEL My Equilibrium Is Off ………………..

Why is this happening to Me these feelings are Overwhelming And Health Hazardous  ……… Detrimental to My Health …. My LIFE ……………………………………………………………… I Feel like I'm in a WAR Zone Over Seas in the Army Or Military and i'm the Target …. I'm the Enemy …. I’m to be Ambushed ………………………………………………………………………...

Take Me Out …. Your Hate for me is so great …………. And I’VE GIVEN YOU EVERYTHING

I've birthed you a nation  …………………………………………………….. You're destroying the medicine Provided by my Ancestors ………… and to think i would be Driving to my Destinations IF ONLY THE POLICE HADN'T ILLEGALLY DRAG AND PULL GUNS ON ME AND MY 2 YOUTH Scholars Ages 9 and 14 all of us nearly Died March 3rd 2016 Leaving from school … and So i salute Me today for Pushing through and making it here today to write in my healing Grieving Mother BLOG …………………………. also it's National Strong Women's Day

2 year later anniversary of me being a Strong Women ……………………R.I.P. my son 10-20-98 - 12/20/15

2 year Of Overcoming gun Violence being Harrased and beat up by Police ……………….

Again i'm not on Probation  or Parole Never used Drugs Don't drink Alcohol never been in Back of PADDYWAGON ,WHY is it sooooooooo Hard to Live Life And BE LEFT ALONE all i do is Spread LOVE and so i've Stopped Driving Started Walking But I Began To LOOSE TRACK OF TIME ……………………………………………………………………………………………………….and began to be very late all the time …………………………………………………………………………

I Began to Barter and do odd jobs for Money to utilize public transpertation ………………………………………….

I'm fucked both ways the car is setting up Right now with Cob Webs On it   TOO Scared to be pulled over utilizing My Children AS TARGET PRACTICE for Consintration Camp Candidates

This is a form of being Held Hostage …………………..i should be able to come and go as i please using public Transportation i feel like i'm a HOSTAGE

And Been Kid Napped Cant Use Bart Safely must Stay CONFINED to MY HOUSE ……… Evil Vibration…….. Are Lurking Where is A Grieving Mother Safe i Just want My Son Back and the closest thing to him is getting to this blog to write to him me and then you