Less Than Zero

by Nancy Muldoon

I was elated last week when I heard the news that Robert Downey Jr. had been arrested and finally fired. And, yes everyone, he really was fired!

He should have been given the pink slip a long time ago. But, Nooooooo, when you are
white, rich and male this somehow excuses criminal behavior.

If Robert Downey Jr. had been black and/or female he would have been thrown to the wolves a long time ago.

Or as my Irish Catholic working class grandmother would say, he wouldnt have a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of!

Indeed!

Now dont get me wrong. I happen to like Robert Downey Jr. a great deal.
I grew up watching him in the brat packer movies and he kicked ass in, Less Than Zero and he was no less than brilliant in Chaplin.

However, there comes a point where, and assuming you dont have corn starch for brains, you grow tired of the well-worn Hollywood excuses. There is so much pressure... blah, blah, blah.

Its exhausting hearing about how the privileged few get a gazillion chances to screw up their lives while most of us only get one.

Then, to add insult to injury, every time his name was mentioned Iíd have to hear some variation of the But, hes just so talented monologue. Which by the way, YES he is talented, but, so what. So are a lot of other people.

I then wondered whether it was some strange Irish Solidarity thing between him and Alley McBeal creator David E. Kelley.

Irish Americans do have a tendency to by loyal. Primarily to themselves and whoeverís buying rounds of Guinness but thatís beside the point.

The worst thing you can do for an addict is to cater to their needs and manipulative ways. Traditionally, Irish males have long been known to be good humored, hardworking fuck-ups who use their handsome looks to get away with all kinds of unsavory behavior. Robert Downey Jr. is no exception. Our tolerance of him as it should have been from the beginning should be no less than zero. Iíll drink to that.