Two People Go Into a Steaming Yoga, One Forgets A Primal Rule.

by Joe B.

Someone likes me so much that I’m in a $10-10 day introductory offer in Bikram Yoga, located at 1334 Polk Street.

It’s called the
Bikram Method, School San Francisco is one of its many locations.

A young friend badgered me into going for the 10-10 deal at the Funky Door Yoga.

If any adventurous soul wants to try it be warned eating an hour before this or other exercises can be a sickening experience.

[www.funkydooryoga.com/ PH: (415) 673-8659].

I know a little about swimming, weight training and eating minutes, or an hour before exercising but its been a few years, since I’ve lifted 250 to 300 or more pounds, using hands or feet when it was possible.

My first day is a Wednesday, [remember Wed. my day off].

Well I ate a tasty, filling mushroom-cheese 3 egg omelet, two slices of toast with butter and jam on the side plus a small glass of apple juice.

The jam I keep not eating it with toast is part of my willpower.

It was stupid but I though "what the heck" some twisting, sitting, very slow Tai Chi-like movements.

My friend who introduced me is not ready but quickly dressed in record time and up Polk Street we trudged with two towels and cold water we would be sharing.

We signed up, take off our street clothes leaving exercise ones on.
My second error is the regular short pants worn not active ware cotton or cotton blend shorts. We take clothes, towels, water, and complementary mats upstairs to where the Bikram Yoga students and teacher’s are. Its

Method is like a dry heat sauna where your movements are slow, deliberate, and methodical reworking of the our body’s internal/ external network into a balanced whole.

It happened in maybe 30 or 45 minutes I was feeling hot, sweating drips from every pore as we drink water. I really felt like the proverbial boiling frog-getting use to being slowly cooked.

My breathing is labored, as I go through some of the movements but when tightening the stomachs, chest, and buttocks I had to leave the class feeling queasy. The sauna effects I’m not using to but the young lady hung in there.

I try again after feeling less ill only after doing other lung, thigh holding moves the feeling of throwing up and this time I knew I’d did a stupid thing eating breakfast like an idiot.

I stay out until the class is over resting on the bench but I didn’t gather my gear and leave the building – which would be a total wimp-out unless it was a medical emergency.
A woman said looking at my how my breathing came in quick shallow, to normal breaths that "it’ll get better after getting use to the heat." "I think the three-egg omelet I had for breakfast near 9 am was the problem." I’m glad it didn’t get thrown up but settled down letting the body’s digestive juices do its job and it had lots of fresh water to help it."

We talked a bit before people started leaving.

"You should keep a journal, your funny."

I decided that I’d try this ten-day thing that knows it might be better.

Me and young women in question left actually I felt like my bones and muscles have jelled and I’m flowing down the stairs without legs so ended my first day in a Bikram Yoga class.
"Oh, God, nine more days of this heat-yoga stuff because I didn’t say right off the bat no first, well from now on I’ll relearn "The Wormy Dance"
Everyone should learn how to "Wormy Dance" it’s a survival technique I’ve lost since working for POOR Magazine.

But after this The Wormy Dance rediscovered.

To my sensei please forgive me I dishonored you and your school can I come back to the dojo and be more serious about my WORMY-FU.

Charles Pitts and I had discussed it weeks ago at a celebration at the United Nations in Civic Center.

Yes, it’s my fault for neglecting the rules of the Wormy Dance… Bye.