Original Post Date
2019-10-01 09:53 AM
Original Body
My name is Ingrid De Leon. Mother of a princess and three beautiful children. This is a story about power. Of leaders of organizations.
I feel like garbage. I was seeking help from my adoptive family. I didn't ask for money. I made tamales, so I could sell them, and they would buy them, and to feel that I wasn't begging for money. But for a moment I felt like I was in the clouds, because there were people buying my tamales, and I needed the money.
My son was in the hospital. He was having heart issues. When I knew about the sum it would take to get medical attention for my son, I thanked the people buying the tamales. My son needed a pacemaker.
But then, just as I was feeling that, I felt belittled. Because the person that had hurt me the most was again humiliating me.
He was in sheep's clothing, with a humiliating smile. I thought to myself, this will not scare the sleep from me.
I spoke to the leader, to tell them my situation. He told me we should meet up and speak. As I was shaking in fear, I went. I felt like it was the worst day of my life.
He who has power to be the leader- he made me feel like I was a bad person. I felt stupid, that I was worthless. He humiliated me in front of all his followers. He kicked me out of his office. I didn't cry. I didn't want people making fun of me. But I did find out, there's a lot of favoritism and a lot of machismo. And just for being a woman, I felt like I didn't have a voice.
This happens around the world. In families, in workplaces, in places that I never thought it would happen. I would think this would never happen at a church.
That's why there's so many people lost in different addictions. Because it's hard to trust anyone nowadays. Anybody can stab you in the back. And the saddest thing is that sometimes, it's our own leaders of churches.
I speak to many people about God. Of the miracles that he has done in my life. But people don't want to hear about that, because people don't trust anyone. Because of all of this, I discover that in 2018, more than 30 percent of people committed suicide for the cause of a leader that has power. They do whatever they want with people, and more if you're a single woman. I learned that no one has good in them. Only God.
As a survivor of all these abuses, violence and discrimination, I have written this. Death is not the solution. It's not the exit. God is the exit for all problems. We just have to trust him, turn our eyes to him. And not to men. We have to live life, because it's beautiful. We should live like it's the last day.
Endless love. Today. Love today. Not tomorrow. Because we don't know if tomorrow will come.